My first Singapore trip

Interesting. Although it did not turned out to be as adventurous as I thought and planned to be, it was still a memorable experience.
Last Saturday nite, AS drove me to PuduRaya. He came in to my doorstep to get me and then we went yum cha for a while. I think his image is scarying mom and sister. They were calling to ask wether he’s a male or female Sis was even more scarrier, told me not to play around and spoil my own future! What the heck….I am not 18, but 26 already ler…and AS is definitely a good fren, no worry. And they actually called Aunt Foong telling her I will be in Sg. Aih….troubling ppl again…

Got on this ‘Konsortium’ bus. I was the last to get on the bus and got the last seat, which is a bit bouncy. But luckily, still managed to get a good sleep.
Many hours later, ppl were getting down the bus, and i was blurred sitting on there looking around with no idea what to do. Bus driver then told me to get down. Couldnt hear exactly what he said, but its something about the passport.
So I just follow where the people go and many question marks on my face. The officer just browse through the passport. Nothing special done to the passport.
Then got up the bus again. I was wondering why is the passport not being stamped.
Asked this guy who moved his seat beside mine. His name, Lok. Lok told me that we have not reach the kastam yet. Then we started the intro session. So this guy was going Sg for meeting, he cant speak english too well, same age as me, graduted from UM and is now in the advertising line. He is a copywriter in Feng Shui.

I chose SGD, its my decision, no regret !

It’s set. Everything is fixed. No more changing, no more indecisive.
Ms Heng forced me to give decision. I asked around and based on my own preference + instinct, I made my final decision to choose Sg. No more regret, its all my own decision.
But one bad news is, Sky will not be confirm by CIS
That’s really cruel. I never expect this could happen. It’s terrible actually.
Felt unfair for him. A bit dissapointed with CIS.
Anyway, I am sure Sky is still young to accept that decision. He still can afford to search for job geh. But for old ppl like me, its really risky.
Risky, really risky.
Never thought i am this worry and scared when the times has come.
Doris only told me I took risky decision after i confirmed my resignation. Duh…
But Ms Heng didn’t mention will welcome me back if anything goes wrong there
But glad she’s wishing me all the best.
I really like CIS colleagues. I’ve never feel this unwilling to resign, not in WNS, not in NZ! Almost cried out. But still manage to control.
Not sure if it’s still controlable on my last day on 29th.
Aih…felt uneasy, sad, scared, worry…no more feeling exciting! haha…sei mei….

Been really close to Sky these few days. I guess everyone in the office are suspecting us to be couple. But I don’t worry at all, cox i know we both doesnt have that intention and we made clear our thinking to each other. No la…it’s not possible between he and I. Especially after a very straightforward chat in the car tonite. I dun like guys younger than me.

Singapore or China? SGD or RMB?

Had a brief chat with Ms Heng.
Told her honestly that I am going Sg to seek for more working exposure and would like to try living in a different world. She said I can go China if i stay in CIS wor. But not really very interested. But still seems to be considerable. I got a week time to consider.
Was so happy after the chat. Moreover, the office connection was down and couldnt work much. Was disturbing others. Sky, Steven, Max and Jun too. She’s cute. We had fun.
She taught me,

make the hell out of sense

Laughed really a lot a lot. I was so happy, felt like a big burden was relieved. Is it because i finally told Ms Heng? or is it because I can leave CIS soon? Not too sure but something for sure is, I did nothing the whole day.
After work (or after a day of laughing), brought the china team to OUG Steven Corner.
Sky said i was indecisive. I was very angry because I remember someone did comment the same thing on me.
Really hate seeing Sky smoking. His look can be really deceiving. His attitude really gave me a shock. This little bro ain’t simple…Anyway, i am trying to treasure all the time to treat everyone good in the office. Gonna leave them…although only 3 months, but it was like 3 years working with them
Couldnt wait for the CNI team to return from India. Will miss David a lot.

There’s no point of return, u are not chilam…

sorry but that’s the fact. nothing can be done to rollback.
i was cruely hurt and mercilessly ‘slaughtered’ like an animal who cries for help but no one will want to listen. no one could listen…
now i got to stand up again by myself. i didnt expect anyone to come to my rescue and
no one will wan to rescue, no one could rescue…
i said, ‘i will hate you forever’…i mean it this time….i said it, i mean it and will act the same thing. sorry but i just realised, the more u approach me, trying to befriend with me again, the more i know i hate u.
I hate you even so when i realised, i started to hate her too.
i am getting annoyed and pissed off with myself too.
its really time for me to release myself from this hatred and anger.
let me go….

singapore should b a great training ground to learn of how to be a smart person.
today, told cassey that i’ll b leaving CIS. she told me many sweet words but i just dun believe her. i dun see myself able to catch up fast and doesnt really perform well. or mayb i have high expectation of myself.

about to hand in the letter to ms heng but she left when i was busy doing the db conversion. argh…but it could be something good cox i can just easily leave the letter on her table.
but tomolo will be a difficult day to face.

kinda like today’s horoscope…

Libra (Sep 24 – Oct 23) – You are in search of partners who are emotionally in tune with you. You want to accomplish great things, but need the assistance of loyal friends. You want love, friendship, success and progress.

To Singapore soon…

Just received the offer letter. Weird, I am not happy at all.
In fact, some dissapointement and sadness.
Gotta leave my CIS fella

I will miss Ms.Heng, David, Cassey, Doris, HowSing, Ang, YienTing and Xiao Wu.
Xiao Wu finally got to work today. He is a very funny and nice guy. Bought us some foods from China. And keeps calling me,

? ? ?

But I’ll leave soon…couldnt go through the CNI war with them anymore.

In fact, I started to question myself whether its worth it let go something i like, just to TRY something else that I can’t foresee how it goes? Sniper asked a good question, am i looking for a way to escape? What I am escaping from? To escape from Ghost? escape from those friends who never really like me to be their frens?I answered him, I need to get more exposure, to broaden my horizon in life and to learn independant. Ya, that’s what I’ve been telling myself, but how exactly true is it? I am in dilemma again.

But, apart from this feeling, my innnerself is pretty confirmed that I will be going. Unless, unless I couldnt make it through the medical approval for the Employment Pass. Sis is right, should have get the pass before doing other arrangements. To get the permit is the first thing I need to do, or else the job offer will no longer valid. Shall ask them tomorrow.

HL asked me, how long will i be in Sg. I just realised, I never thought of this question. But, it should be that, I won’t come back again. I won’t switch from Sg to My anymore.